The Poetry Corner

Parody On The Recorder's Speech

By Jonathan Swift

TO HIS GRACE THE DUKE OF ORMOND, 4TH JULY, 1711 This city can omit no opportunity of expressing their hearty affection for her majesty's person and government; and their regard for your grace, who has the honour of representing her in this kingdom. We retain, my lord, a grateful remembrance of the mild and just Administration of the government of this kingdom by your noble ancestors; and, when we consider the share your grace had in the happy Revolution, in 1688, and the many good laws you have procured us since, particularly that for preventing the farther growth of Popery, we are assured that that liberty and property, that happy constitution in church and state, to which we were restored by King William of glorious memory, will be inviolably preserved under your grace's administration. And we are persuaded that we cannot more effectually recommend ourselves to your grace's favour and protection, than by assuring you that we will, to the utmost of our power, contribute to the honour and safety of her majesty's government, the maintenance of the succession in the illustrious house of Hanover, and that we shall at all times oppose the secret and open attempts of the Pretender, and all his abettors. THE RECORDER'S SPEECH EXPLAINED BY THE TORIES An ancient metropolis, famous of late For opposing the Church, and for nosing the State, For protecting sedition and rejecting order, Made the following speech by their mouth, the Recorder: First, to tell you the name of this place of renown, Some still call it Dublin, but most Forster's town. THE SPEECH May it please your Grace, We cannot omit this occasion to tell, That we love the Queen's person and government well; Then next, to your Grace we this compliment make, That our worships regard you, but 'tis for her sake: Though our mouth be a Whig, and our head a Dissenter, Yet salute you we must, 'cause you represent her: Nor can we forget, sir, that some of your line Did with mildness and peace in this government shine. But of all your exploits, we'll allow but one fact, That your Grace has procured us a Popery Act. By this you may see that the least of your actions Does conduce still the most to our satisfactions. And lastly, because in the year eighty-eight You did early appear in defence of our right, We give no other proof of your zeal to your Prince; So we freely forget all your services since. It's then only we hope, that whilst you rule o'er us, You'll tread in the steps of King William the glorious, Whom we're always adoring, tho' hand over head, For we owe him allegiance, although he be dead; Which shows that good zeal may be founded in spleen, Since a dead Prince we worship, to lessen the Queen. And as for her Majesty, we will defend her Against our hobgoblin, the Popish Pretender. Our valiant militia will stoutly stand by her, Against the sly Jack, and the sturdy High-flier. She is safe when thus guarded, if Providence bless her, And Hanover's sure to be next her successor. Thus ended the speech, but what heart would not pity His Grace, almost choked with the breath of the City!