The Whitest Man I Know
By John Milton Hayes
& R. Fenton Gower
Hes acruisin in a pearler with a dirty nigger crew,
Abuyin pearls and copra for a stingy Spanish Jew,
And his face is tannd like leather neath a blazin tropic Sun,
And hes workin out a penance for the things he hasnt done.
Round the Solomons he runs, tradin beads and castoff guns,
Buyin pearls from grinnin niggers, loadin copra by the ton;
And hell bargain and hell smile, but hes thinkin all the while
Of the penance that hes workin out for sins he hasnt done.
Wed been round the Horn together, and Id come to know his worth;
The greatest friend Id ever had, the whitest man on earth.
Hed pulld me out of many a scrape, hed riskd his life for me,
And side by side, for many a year, wed roughd it on the sea;
But a woman came between us; she was beautiful as Venus,
And she set her cap at him until she hookd him unawares:
And I sailed off on my own
Leavin him and her alone:
Signd aboard a tramp for Frisco, leavin them in Bunos Ayres.
When I met him in a twelvemonth he was goin to the deuce,
For shes blackend all the good in him, shed playd him fast and loose,
And shed gone off with a Dago who was lettin dollars fly,
And shed left my mate to drink his precious soul away and die.
Well, I talkd and talkd him over, and we signd aboard The Rover.
It was just like good old times, until we shord at Rio Bay;
Then the hand of Fate showd plain brought us face to face again
With the woman, and the Dago who had taken her away.
We were sittinin a cafe when the couple came along,
She simply smild and passd us by, then vanishd in the throng.
My mate jumpd up to follow, but I wouldnt let him stir,
And later on a waiter brought a note that came from her:
She pretended she regretted
What shed done, and that she fretted
For the wrong that she had done him, and she wanted to atone;
There was so much to explain,
Would he meet her once again
After midnight, in her garden she would watch for him, alone.
Course he went, but unbeknown to him I followd on behind.
I watchd, and saw the shadows of two figures on the blind
The woman and the Dago and I heard the Dago shout,
They quarrelld, and the woman screamd and then a shot rang out.
My mate dashd thro the curtain
And I followd, makincertain
That my little gun was ready case I had to make a stand:
There I saw the Dago dead,
With a bullet thro his head,
And the woman standin near him with a shooter in her hand.
Before the Civil Guard came in my mate had snatchd her gun,
And he askd them to arrest him for the thing he hadnt done.
I tried madly to explain things, but they shook their heads at me,
And the woman let them take him, so that she might get off free.
In the court I sat and heard her
Tell them all hed done the murder,
And I prayd she might be stricken into some shape,
He was sentencd for his life
But out there corruptions rife,
And I bribd and bribd, until at last I managd his escape.
Then I stowd him on a hooker sailin far from womans wiles,
And hes workin his salvation out amongst the South Sea Isles;
And the womans there at Rio, and shes weavin of her spell,
With a crowd of fools awaitin her commands to burn in hell;
Whilst the whitest man I know
Runs a Christy minstrel show,
Buyinpearls from dirty niggers neath a blazin tropic sun,
And hell cussem, and hell smile
But hes thinkin all the while
Of the penance that hes workinout for things he hasnt done.