The Poetry Corner

Cases - Mylward V. Weldon

By James Williams

[The plaintiff was committed to the Fleet Prison on Feb. 8, 1596, by order of the Lord Keeper, for drawing a replication of sixscore sheets containing much impertinent matter which might well have been contained in sixteen. On Feb. 10 the Lord Keeper ordered that on the following Saturday the Warden of the Fleet should cut a hole through the replication, and put the plaintiff's head through the hole and let it hang about his shoulders with the written side outwards, and lead the plaintiff bareheaded and barefaced round about Westminster Hall, and show him at the bar of all the courts, and so back to the Fleet.--Abridged from Spence's Equitable Jurisdiction, vol. i. p. 376.] 'Gainst Weldon Mylward files a bill, But doth his replication fill With scandalous and idle matter, That would disgrace the maddest hatter. Woe is me for Mylward! 'Twas sixscore sheets, it might have been Contained, and amply, in sixteen; So after that the court hath risen Must Mylward Fleetward go to prison. Woe is me for Mylward! And two days afterwards 'tis meet That by the Warden of the Fleet He be led on in slow progression Through every court that sits in session. Woe is me for Mylward! The pleading writ with words so fair Must Mylward like a tabard wear, A hole therein, the Warden cuts it, A head put through it, Mylward puts it. Woe is me for Mylward! The bar makes merry at his shame; What careth he? He winneth fame, Three hundred years his reputation Hath rested on that replication. Woe is me for Mylward!