Mouths Of Hippopotami And Some Recent Novels
By Ellis Parker Butler
(with apologies to Frederic Taber Cooper)
I well recall (and who does not)
The circus bill-board hippopotamus,
whose wide distended jaws
For fear and terror were good cause.
That month, that vasty carmine cave,
Could munch with ease a Nubian slave;
In fact, the bill-board hippopot-
amus could bolt a house and lot!
Wide opened, that tremendous mouth
Obscured three-quarters of the south
Side of Schmidts barn, and promised me
Thrills, shocks, delights and ecstasy.
And then, alas! what sad non plus
The living hippopotamus!
Twas but a stupid, sodden lump
As thrilling as an old elm stump.
Its mouth, unreasonably small,
The hippo opened not at all,
Or, if it did, it was about
As thrilling as a teapot spout.
*****
The Crimson Junk, by Doris Watt,
Ive read it. Who, I pray, has not?
Bill Wastel, by C. Marrow. The
Plaid Cowslip. And The Hocking Lee.
The Fallow Field, by Sally Loo;
The Rose in Chains. Ive read that too;
Ive read them all for promised treat
Of thrills, emotions, tremblings sweet.
*****
The bill-board hippopotamus
It was a wild, uprageous cuss,
The real one? Well, Can you recall
That it had any mouth at all?